They're not out there killing it

I messed up. I di it again. How is it that I just can’t get this thing right?  How many times has that gone through your mind? If I’m honest, It goes through my mind a lot. I immediately recall the people I look up to and think, how are they out there killing it at this life thing and I’m  here starting over? 

 Well, they’re probably not.  But they do have a secret weapon you may not know about.  They understand mercy and grace. As Paul starts this conversation in Romans 7:15, I do not understand my own actions. I do the things I don’t want to do…, He’s been there. The bottom line. We are human. It takes a few mess ups.

When I think of this I remember my son’s experience when he was about three years old. We live on a farm so we have electric fence dividing the farm from the house and yard to keep the cows where they belong.  Since he could walk, I have told him; “Don’t touch the fence, it will hurt you.”  We couldn’t move the fence to keep him from getting hurt, he just had to learn not to touch it. As you can probably guess, a 3 year told not to do something is like telling a gorilla not to eat the banana. He touches the fence. He yells and cries. I go over to him, pick him up, hold him and point to the fence.  I gently tell him, “this fence will hurt you.”  I put him down anticipating that now he knows.  The next day I hear a little scream then a cry.  I look around the corner where he was playing with his trucks. He touched the fence again. I knew what he was thinking. The fence on one side of the yard hurt me, but maybe this side won’t. So I repeat my drill. I pick him up. Tell him its ok. Point to the fence. This fence will hurt you.  There. That ought to do it. Two days later. We are out in the front of the house and he is standing by the fence watching his dad feed the cows. He grabs the fence. Scream. Cry. Pick up. Point to fence. Put child down. I think he finally got it.  It took three times for him to realize that the fence behind the yard, side of the yard and the front yard are all the same fence.

No one gets everything right the first time. Trial and error. Just remember that in between the trials, we have a loving Father who picks us up, wipes our tears, gently reminds us that this is not what is good for you then puts us down to learn again. Mercy. Grace.

The call to action for today. As you realize the mercy and grace that is given to you, extend this to others around you. We are all human, in this together and sometimes just need a gentle reminder from others that its OK not to be perfect. Do-overs are a thing.

Fear and Fire

I have a new favorite movie. I spent last weekend watching Skyscraper, twice. I’m surprised at how much I loved this movie since I can’t get to the third rung of a ladder without anxiety. I wig out even watching videos of people washing widows on tall buildings. So as you can probably guess, this movie is about a skyscraper so it is filled with some of the most death defying, height challenging scenes. I think I spent most of it curled up in the fetal position. If you haven’t seen it, I don’t know if there are spoilers or not so read on at your own risk.

The basis of the movie is about a father, Will Sawyer, who would do whatever it takes, even to his own death to save his family from this burning skyscraper.  He loves his family more than his own life. I spend the first hour and 15 minutes holding my breath until I get to this scene. When all seems lost, when Will promises he will find a way out but flames and destruction have surrounded them with absolutely no hope for rescue, this happens. He takes his daughter in his arms. He sits down behind her and surrounds her with himself and all he says to her is “I got you. I got you.”

This is when the tears start to fall. I am in the mind of this little girl and I know that even if I perish right now, my father, who loves me more than life itself, is holding me in his arms, going through the fire with me, and he says the only thing I need to hear right now , “I got you.” Hearing that safe and secure voice, the fear melts away and no matter what happens, as long as I’m with Him, I am ok.

I feel like I’ve been there many times in my life, surrounded by fire with no way of escape. That’s when I hear, “I got you.”  The fear melts away and I again have the strength to face the fire. Safe.  Secure. No matter what.

Penny Candy - The Story Behind the Stories

The joys of my life are writing,  photography, sharing the good parts of life and inspiring others. Some people look at the past with defeat and regret. I choose to look at the diamonds that bring joy and happiness. We need to realize that its not all struggle and trouble and to fix our minds on the things that are and have been good and wonderful amidst everything else. 

This is how inspiration comes to me. I have a thought, I’m literally given a story in my mind to write and I write it down. Today I need to share the beginning.

When I look back on the past years of my childhood/teen years, my favorite parts always came from the visits with my grandparents.  I don’t know what it was but it was where happiness and freedom lived.  Every time we would visit, my  brothers and I were given each a dollar.  We loved to walk the seemingly many miles to the closest store in rural New Hampshire. Starting by the river, through the covered bridge and along the side of the road. This adventure took us all day. From rock throwing competitions off the bridge to finding little treasures in the rocks by the river. 

Our destination was candy, lots of candy.  When we finally arrived at the store with our dollar, we had to be diligent to make this dollar get as much candy as we could.  Penny Candy was the goal. The bigger the bag, the better the score.  We opted for bottle caps and suckers, odd things in wrappers, and sometimes powdery sugar stuff with dip sticks. 

After we filled our bags, we began the trek back home. It was in reality just about a mile. We traded candy and played along the bridges. Sometimes we would sit and sort our loot and decide what we would save or eat. Our parents never worried about us as long as we were home by dinner. We were never in trouble for our bad choices of blowing our dollar all on candy, and not once did anyone mention the mud on our shoes and body from the big adventure.  As a matter of fact, my grandfather would even have more candy hidden in his pockets to add to our loot bags.

The quest for Penny Candy was about the journey. It wasn’t about the prize at the end or who has more or better, just about how much fun the adventure was and the irreplaceable time with my brothers and my grandparents.

I look at the future with the same expectation. Not about the stuff or who has what or who is accomplishing their goals or not, I see the adventure. The time we spend just spending time with family and friends opening our loot bags of life sharing and trading all the parts. We are on this journey together. I will share with you my treasures and I hope it will make this stretch of roadway a little more enjoyable.

Weeds of Illusion

Things farmers know are seemingly infinite.  With my abbreviated knowledge in farming, cultivating, raising livestock, I have learned to ask a lot of questions.   It seems that things are never as they appear so education is vital to be successful.

The farmland we have is mostly for cattle and hay.  My husband and I spend a lot of time riding around the farm checking fence and fields to make sure everything is in good condition for the cattle.  On one such escapade,  we were riding through the field and came upon a patch of really pretty purple flowers.  I pointed them out and said how pretty they were. “Those are weeds” he said “ We should spray those”. That made me a little sad. To me they were so pretty.  To a farmer, they are a hindrance and get in the way of the grass available to the cows.

We have had many conversations like this over so many plants I thought were visually stunning only to find out that my husbands ultimate goal it to eradicate it all.  The more I learned about the different vegetation that grew around the farm, the more I understood.  Most may look beautiful but they spread like crazy and take over fields and render them uneatable to livestock.  Some can even kill the cattle. 

I realized just because something is visually enticing, doesn’t mean it’s good. Or good for you.  So much of the world is based on “pretty” or “good” when that couldn’t be more deceptive.

The Call

On 7:00am Thursday morning you receive a call. Its from headquarters.  The Company you have invested in for years.  You have built your life based on this position and income.  The phone call is from your boss.  He says that on Friday at 8:00am, you will be called into a meeting with the CEO and this meeting will determine whether you keep your job or not.  If you are terminated, everything you have worked for falls apart and you are destitute.  The only thing your boss cant tell you is what exactly will determine you keeping your job with the company. It could be your stats. It could be your presentation of sales. It could  be your contacts but he’s not exactly sure.  Now, how do you spend your Friday?  What you do in the next 24 hours could determine your fate. Do you spend it going through your records, dotting I’s and crossing T’s making sure everything is in order to the best of your ability? Everything is at stake. Or do you spend it like every other day because, hey, you’re awesome, right?

It might seem like a no brainer in this situation but what if you found out today was your last day on the planet? Same phone call only your boss is Jesus and God is your CEO. You will step into eternity tomorrow. Everything is at stake. The difference is that you have the intel.  You are told exactly what you need to do to secure your future for eternity but the question still remains, what would you do? 

Those who have ears, let them hear.