The Perfect Plan

My favorite activity in the fall is being up in the morning alone with a cup of coffee and sitting on the porch completely admiring the changing leaves. There is so much quiet and beauty that takes me far away from everyday craziness.

This morning I was joined by a praying mantis. This time of year, they turn brown and it was quite a surprise to sit down next to this little guy.  He didn’t move or jump away. He just cocked his little head and acknowledged my presence as he continued on with his praying.  This is the point my mind begins to wonder down the rabbit hole of solstice.

What a marvelous creation God has made.  Is this little guy a male? If he is does he know when he mates, he’ll be eaten? Does he know its his destiny or purpose? Is this some kind of sacrificial mating? I wasn’t kidding about the rabbit hole.  I then began to think of other creatures that fascinate me. Glow worms. Those are some cool and weird sights. What was their purpose besides lighting the path as I walk to my car on a moonless night? Stick bugs.  I have only seen a few stick bugs around the house. They really make you think God was like, Hey, lets take this twig and give it some legs and see what happens here.

All this wondering points me to creation.  We all know God created these creatures in one day. I have always pictured – HERE –and there they were, but if you think about it, not only did God speak all this into being, He also had to give each and every thing direction, their marching orders so to speak. Tell the trees “grow leaves, have them change color and shed them. Then wait a few months and grow some new ones.” Each and everything on the planet it’s specific instruction of how interact with the world.  Now that is an amazing and fantastic wonder!

Then there’s humans and this apple. We too have our orders, our destinies and how to interact with the world.  The only difference is we have a choice. We ate the apple and become aware.  Nothing else on the planet is given the luxury of choice.  Would the praying mantis, knowing what we know, choose to mate? Even our pets that we so humanize, are given their instruction and act accordingly.

As I think of all these things in the quiet of the morning watching the leaves fall and the mantis now start cleaning his paws, I find such peace and comfort in such a perfect plan.  Everything is at it should be in all it’s beauty.

It was, is and always will be Love

In light of the recent week of stirring emotions, I am noticing the hashtag lovewins.  I am perplexed by this statement, and I agree with it. Love did win. 2000 years ago. On a cross. When Jesus gave his life to take our sins upon himself, past-present and any future that we would ever commit.  That is true love. Why did this have to happen?  In getting a perspective on this I thought about the time before I was married.

When my husband and I were dating, we lived an hour away from each other.  As things got serious and we fell in love, that hour seemed like 10 hours away.  We were able to get about 2 days a week together due to jobs and our schedules.  The rest of the time we were separated from each other. The longer we dated the harder it was on those days we didn't get to see each other. Finally, when it just seemed so hard to continue always leaving each other and not being able to have all the time together we wanted, he asked me to marry him.  We could have ended it and gone our own ways but love won and we chose to make a commitment to it. That was the pivotal moment when we decided that we wouldn't have to stay apart forever.

God is holy. He cannot reside in sin.  That's why we were separated from him. If you're like me, you know how agonizing it feels to be separated from your true love. Something would have to be done. A marriage-A cross.

We now have only have one goal here before we get to heaven. Love. Persue a love for God and a love for each other.  Everything else is white noise.

An Apology I Owe

You know that feeling as the roller coaster is slowly creeping up the hill and you know at some point it will get to the top and then you'll take off? Well, today I hit that hill. paused, and then went for the ride of my life.  The past few days feel like crazy just took over the world out of nowhere and sucked everyone into this vortex, me included.  It was a test I'm sure. I guess I will have to ask for a make up. 

I never comment on issues on facebook.  I just don't. Facebook is where I share my cool pictures for my family and play a couple games when I'm bored.  Yesterday, I broke my rule.  I was so stirred up because we are so human. I wrote  a couple of posts. One on a new fb page and some others on status's. I knew something wasn't right because I haven't had any peace about this since.

So the back story; the before to the after...  I live in the South, formerly from the Northeast. As for the community I live in, the Civil War is over, they hold reenactments to teach history to the children and everything is as it should be.  No one is showing any signs of discrimination. No one flies a rebel flag in the yard. No one runs around smearing rebellious campaigns against other persons.  We are overly nice and respectful to everyone.  We even go out of our way to teach respect of all other living things to our children. The only time I saw a rebel flags is when it was wrapped around the grave of my neighbors great grandfather who fought in the civil war.  It's a family thing. Honestly, I did not realize that people were still finding offense of this symbol until a friend, who I would never hurt in a million years (DJ), put it in perspective for me. I would not be so soft hearted if it were a Nazi swastika. My heart sank to my feet when the revelation hit me and I felt awful. So my choice is people. I choose them over any symbol or idol.  Do what you want with the laws, flags, marriages, or whatever but if one thing I do or say hurts someone else, especially my friends and family, I am breaking the law of the spirit and this causes me more grief than anything. So, in short, I'm sorry.

There are and always will be drama in this country, laws passed, sins disputed, humans being humans but ...as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.  I am a child of the one true King and for me, I go to the bible to find the truth and the right thing to do and will stand behind it but would never disrespect anyone for any reason or use my mouth as a weapon of mass destruction.  All I ask is that you do the same for me in return. 

As for the post on the news fb page that got like 200 likes (who cares)which I wrote concerning this subject, I have since deleted it.  I certainly hope that if the testing comes around again, I can act more like Jesus and just sit back and love on my friends no matter what they are going through or the stance they decide to take. 

Learn Quickly

In life, this is a repetitive theme. Learn quickly. Realize a wrong turn and correct your direction before you get too far down the road.  After a bible study this morning on the subject, it started my brain thinking.  I would think back to when we were kids and our parents had to teach us this same thing. I also thought back to when my son was young and I was the teacher.

We live on a farm so child proofing is out of the question.  In order to keep him safe, instead of removing the obstacles, he would have to learn what and where was safe and what he should avoid.  He turned two in the spring and we were ready for a lot of outside time.  I brought him outside and pointed out the electric fence that separates the yard from the rest of the farm.

“Do not touch this. This is an electric fence. It will shock you and hurt you. You will cry if you do.” 

At that instant I knew his wheels were turning in there.  Why can’t I touch it? It doesn’t look “electric”. Maybe it won’t shock me like she says…    It only took a day or two for that child to reach out and grab it. To his benefit, our fences weren’t as strong as they should be and I knew that if he did end up getting into it, the shock would be minimal. And it did shock. He cried. I was relieved. I thought well that takes care of that. Now he knows and will avoid this fence in the future.  The problem with parenting is our lack of ability to think like a child.  What I didn’t anticipate was his thought that well, the fence over here is bad, maybe the one over there won’t shock me.  Here we go again.  I saw the arm reach out before I even had a chance to get the words out of my mouth.  He was shocked, he cried. This would happen just one more time until his brain decided that all wire attached to poles surrounding field is off limits.  Learn quickly.

As we grow up, our parents hand over the reins and we have to learn on our own which fences are electric and which aren’t.  It’s a lot harder when you don’t have someone coming right out and telling you what’s safe and what isn’t and giving instant correction when we reach for the wrong thing. Even though I have an Owner’s Manual in ESV version to tell me, I still need to practice learning quickly.

Finding Your Child's Talents

I have been a parent for 29 years.  I'm by far "certified by a major university" expert on the subject.  I can only report my experiences.  So here is what's on my heart today.

What do we really want for our kids?  It is to be happy and successful in life. Thats it in a nutshell. Even though the definition of those two things differ for everyone, the bottom line is the same. If my child finds excitement in the stars, why would I make him play baseball? Point being, each child we have been blessed with is born with  their own gifts and talents.  This creates a happy, successful child that becomes a happy successful adult.  It may sound easy and really basic but it isn't. Here's some of my attempts:

Is sports the answer?

I put all my kids in sports starting at about 4 and all had different outcomes.  My daughter, first child, hit the most homeruns on her team yet was #1 in strikeouts as well. She's an "all in or all out" kind of child. To this day she is either totally wrapped up in something or has nothing to do with it.  The #2 child. Lets see. He was there playing ball. I never knew if he liked it or not. He was just there for every game and every practice. He is the "I do whats expected of me because thats the right thing to do" child. Ok so third time's a charm, right? Nope. #3 child is the one that shows up to practice and is more interested in chewing gum that what a glove is. On game day, he's the one hanging from the dugout fence with that look on his face like "take me home so I don't have to be in front of all these people watching me!"  So #3 is my loner. He thrives on his own and crumbles in a group. So, yes, put your children in sports.  The chances of rearing a Babe Ruth is slim to none and is no guarantee that this will keep them drug free, but if you are really paying attention, you'll find out who your children really are.

You can't create the gift.

As parents, we want control. We feel we earned the right to control our kids because all of a sudden someone is referring to you as so and so's mom or dad.  Not true. We have to give them some freedom to show us what they want/need/like. I'm that kind of  parent that actually tries to find out what my kids talents are as soon as possible. I would set legos in front of them to see who's going
to be an engineer. Intently watching them like they were in a control group to see if there was a spark. I ended up with a bunch of  "like new" legos for the yard sale. This went on and on. Some of my other tests were guitars, telescopes, roller blades, sports, airplanes, hiking trips, metal detectors, rock digs, museums, art, crafts and whatever else I could come up with.  Each time wondering if this or that would catch or create an attachment.
By the time my kids were teenagers, I was exhausted. I finally decided  "Ah, they'll figure it out" and they did. On their own. To my amazement, they are doing what they love, without my help, and I've never seen them happier.

They are watching you!

I know people hear this alot and many times think that it applies to that huge fight or that great success or that awesome vacation.  So not true!
Actually mostly the opposite.  My kids may not remember, clearly anyway, the vacations, or a wedding in the family or even what jobs I've had.  They do remember the time I picked them off the pavement after their first bike ride. They do remember the words I spoke that soothed them during the storm. They do remember their favorite book I would read to them as they drifted off.  They are watching the real you. Not the you you want the world to see.

As our children decide what makes them happy and what gifts they may have to give to the world, they will recall what made them happy. I have always loved  photography and traveling to pretty places to get the best shot. I always had to bring my young son with me because leaving him home at 6 was not legal. He sat in the back seat and talked about random things so I figured he was enduring his sentence and waiting to get home. This repeated many times. This now is one of his favorite happy places. Behind the lens of a camera in a beautiful setting. It brings him the same feeling as it did spending a pretty spring day on an excursion with mom. The examples could go on but then it would be a book.

So, in short, sports are good but chill out, they are not earning scholarships at 11. Legos are for play and not experimenting and the most important; you have to be the person you want your child to become.  More on that later.

#ILived

So welcome 2015.  As we greet this year, like every new year, with hope and optimism of a time to come filled with endless possibilities, I have the flu.  This  actually has been the best start to the year that I could ask for.  Back in  late 2014, I began thinking of all the things I might change or not change but, as with all of us, sometimes our lives are so busy that even if we wanted to explore new avenues or take new roads, we just don’t have the time.  Well, here I find myself home sick for over a week now, unable to have the energy to just go to the store and it has been the best worst thing ever.

In my boredom, accompanied by my resolution, I find myself excited about new ventures I want to take on this year.  Whether they come about or not, it is an excitement I have as I sit here on my couch with a bunch of tissues for company.

My first resolution this year is to get a bible plan and read the bible in a year. I know, I have started this many time before only to have springtime roll around and call me to the great outdoors and leave my readings in the middle of Numbers with a promise to continue at some point.  So I begin again… Genesis 1:1.  Yesterday I made it to the point where we are counting Jacobs descendants before he dies.  There were 70. Wow, I thought. Can you imagine living to see 70 of your direct descendants?

This brings my mind to my own family. My past.  The people who have set the stage for my life and have paved a way for me to live in this time with the resources and spirit that I have.  All of them in a book at the top of my closet put together by the writers and readers long ago that wanted to ensure the family would never forget the way it all started. 

As I open the first page, the introduction was enough to humble me and put in the perspective of who I am. Here is the text:

“This is the story of your GIBSON ancestors. It is, of course, incomplete but I leave it to your imagination or to further exploration to round out the story of the lives of the men and women noted here. Your ancestors were not important people. For the most part they were uneducated artisans – farmers, carpenters, fishermen, shoemakers, tavern and store keepers; hard working, simple people who made up the bulk of early immigrants to New England – people who were responsible for the development of the Colonies and our democratic way of life. Your GIBSON ancestors were good citizens. They served continually in public office as selectmen, surveyors, assessors, constables, representatives to the General Court, etc.  They were church going people, too, taking their turn serving as deacons and as members of the various church committees. You will be proud to note that this record of church and community service runs through ten generations.”

You know what I love?  That even with all the service in politics and things of the state, she finishes with what I should be most proud of: church and community service.  There it is.  This is what the family of my past holds dear.  This is where we have strayed.  We were meant to have a life filled with joy in serving and worshiping.  These two things I am sure of are what make my life in the here and now so wonderful.  I could write pages of all the cool stuff I am finding but that I will save for another time.  These are the sweet penny candy treats I so adore.